“I will get to when,” “I would be better if,” “I can’t start until,” “I gave up because”
By no means am I a biblical scholar. However, the nudges I received this week let me know that I had to write a blog post that reflects the direction that speaks to me. This month, my post is based on a specific scripture, Matthew 17:20, but begins with verses 15-18. Revisiting hope and how I can move past thoughts that disrupt my blessings.
The Story
A father brought his son to the disciples to cure his child but could not understand why they couldn’t perform the miracle like Jesus, which they, the disciples, voiced to Jesus. Jesus replies, “…they have no faith and are corrupt,” and then he cures the child. The order is slightly different, but you get the story’s context. Hope in a miracle.
The verse, Matthew 17:20:
“You don’t have enough faith. If you have the faith of a mustard seed, then it will move mountains.”
My Reflection:
On Wednesday, I woke up with self-doubt about financial abundance. I thought about my bills and investments then the feeling of self-doubt increased after I checked my bank account to see the available funds before going to the grocery store to purchase a few items. My life hasn’t always been easy, but I’d gotten to a certain level of comfort. Until now, Nana Naysayer quietly interfered but remained tamed because I provided for my children. Hope in stability kept Nana Naysayer at arm’s length.
Fast forward to now, my role from provider of many has changed. I am willing to take more risks since my children are grown and independently functioning in their own lives. Yet, the worry crept in. The phrases “they have no faith” and “you don’t have enough faith” struck me like being hit with water balloons while running down Clinton Street in Gary as a child. While at the same time, it reminded me to walk in faith for the purpose God gave me. Moreover, to allow the thoughts to come and go without judgment and to continue to thank Him in advance. Hope in my dreams without an age limit.
The Message
Indeed, at that moment, Nana Naysayer got a different job. Her new duty was to help me write this blog post, so I could share it with you. My message is to keep speaking your dream, desires and hopes into existence. Believe in yourself at every level, not just when things are going well.
Give Yourself Permission to Be Kind to Yourself
- Despite the self-doubt, know that you are worthy.
- Even I remind myself of this every day. For me, saying the words make all the difference. However, if you say the words aloud or internally, it’s kindness. Hope in yourself.
- In addition, open your mind. Approach uncertainty or fear with an open mind to change how and what we manifest. To be closed off limits the ability to receive. So, start with self-forgiveness. Begin with one limiting belief that no longer serves you that is holding you captive from dreaming big. I can tell you this… it’s not one-and-done. It is a lifestyle like nutrition, and gentle movement. Hope in the promise of new beginnings.
- Furthermore, change the narrative.
- Instead of it’s always been this way, try “this is what I’ve done in the past, but I am willing to explore something new.” This is self-acceptance. Standing in self-acceptance means you no longer accept a reality that has “always been this way.” My walk began like a crawl; I gradually could stand. Next, I was able to walk. I stumbled and even fell a few times, but I kept getting up until my walk became a run. On days when I’m struggling, I extend myself grace because I know that small steps are progress. Hope in growth.
- Also, seek a positive perspective.
- Appreciate what works, what doesn’t, and what is in the works. When Nana Naysayer creeps in with a negative thought, reframe it into a positive thought. A great example is the words I say to myself when things aren’t progressing as fast as I want them to. I remind myself of why I started in the first place. I celebrate the small achievements I’ve experienced since beginning the task.
Most importantly, always remember
WE are WORTHY!
