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reniimodisette • April 15, 2022

It is not unusual for me to have a different visual in my head from what others see. An area where I know this is true is my body language. In my head, I am conveying the message of engagement, confidence, and understanding. In reality, I don’t feel self-sureness. For instance, I am slouching as I’m sitting. Periodically, my eyes go on a voyage. Lastly, I have a questionable facial expression. It’s not that I don’t understand; I am oblivious or aloof; instead, I have not taken the opportunity to honor my value. I haven’t filled the room with my presence. Filling the room isn’t a grand gesture! I am fully showing up now instead of waiting for permission. That said, as women empowering each other, keep in mind, people would make room when showing up in mind and body. 


Certainly, my lack of self-sureness is the result past experiences contribute to feeling like I’ve lost an intangible part of my person. At some point, I’ve also forgotten I deserve to take up space, the opportunity, or the accolade. Knowing this, this week, I decided to keep a log of every time I shrunk my presence in the room. On average, each day, I did it five or six times. I often felt undervalued or unappreciated, and I quietly asked myself, “why am I here”- even if only for a second. Hence, feeling no self-sureness. I began to counter the thought with a fact: 


•          “I am here because I deserve to be.” 

•          “I will not pull myself down. I’ve earned my seat.”


Indeed, my journey continues with me working to reframe my thought process, so my next steps begin with adjusting my posture by sitting up straight to refocus my energy, followed by deep breaths. That’s MY HUG! MY grand gesture! I attempted to be intentional but not abandon myself during a vulnerable time. It is my way of empowering myself to be while acknowledging my root cause. The root causes of my thoughts are a result of insecurity manifested by experience as a women in corporate America- 

About my capability (even though I know I have skills).

My ability to be a fully supportive mom. Instead I’m frustrated about work. I’m not fully present. Despite my most profound desire always to be a safe space of unconditional love .


Show gratitude to me (self-care is not restricted to a specific day or time).

Considering, body language and how it manifests is an essential topic across many areas of daily living. I don’t have the answers, nor can I say that I’ve had conversations with women seeking to empower women about this, but it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t. Can we support each other passing on a morning walk, in the store, after our wallet has been lost, keys locked in the car, in a meeting (in-person or virtually) when our body language is screaming for support! You got this!

LEAN INTO:CouRagE EMBRACE: Honesty, Bravery, and Perseverance

By Renii Modisette • December 27, 2024
We begin to say goodbye to 2024 with cooler temperatures and yuletide attitudes as December ends. One thing is sure: self-regulation starts with the Self despite all else. In the last blog for 2024, I explore the sixth and final virtue, Courage, as well as three character strengths: Honesty, Bravery, and Perseverance, with the pendulum swinging both ways as a reminder we can make it through the first starting with Self. A great conclusion to the MTO Lean-in Series, which focuses on character strengths and virtues from the VIA Institute. I had initially planned to finish this series in October, but I found myself overwhelmed with school and work. I had convinced myself that I could push through despite feeling fatigued. However, I realized that the virtue of Courage also encompasses the character strength of Honesty. It was time for me to be honest with myself, which meant reevaluating the narrative I had created in my head. So, I took a break and reframed my internal dialogue to accept my revised story to remind myself that the pendulum swings both ways, so I must put myself first and focus on myself to overcome a self-imposed narrative that pushing through is the best way. I challenge you, amidst this season of giving and gratitude, to be honest with yourSELF—it's a personal journey. Is being honest with yourself a sign of bravery? Depending on who you ask, you might get different answers. In my opinion, yes, we are often harder on ourSELVES than anyone else is. Bravery is usually defined as resilience, facing fears, and not shrinking in the face of a threat or challenge. So, why can't SELF be a challenge? To help you navigate this solitary journey of self-awareness, consider the following statement:  "I AM in charge of how I react to others. I choose to respond in a positive way."

Where are you on the tightrope? MTO Lean-in Series, Part IV

By Renii Modisette • October 13, 2024
Hello October! Q4 is in full swing, with MTO KPIs still at the forefront. It feels like I was saying "Happy New Year" just yesterday. Towards the end of June, I began the MTO Lean-in Series, which focuses on character strengths and virtues from the VIA Institute. I learned about the character strengths and virtues while completing my Positive Psychology Practitioner studies and found them intriguing, especially in relation to enhancing my mindfulness practice. So far, I've covered Temperance, Transcendence, Humanity, and Justice. This month, I'll be discussing the fifth virtue, Wisdom, as well as three character strengths: Judgment, Curiosity, and Perspective. I'll then conclude the series with the sixth virtue in the November blog post. For more information on VIA's character strengths, please visit the VIA Institute website at https://www.viacharacter.org. WISDOM Let’s begin with I've coined the Wisdom Tightrope when discussing the virtue of Wisdom because it involves a balancing act depending on the situation. The first character strength, Judgment, is rooted in critical thinking to counteract faulty thinking and biased opinions. When overused, Judgment can lead to narrow-mindedness, and when underused, one isn't reflective enough. Ironically, it is often frowned upon to judge ourselves and others, yet our analytical mind somehow gets in the way, which allows us to debate whether something that is frowned upon should be up for discussion.

MTO Lean In Series: Part III

By Renii Modisette • September 2, 2024
This month's blog post features Part III of the MTO Lean in Series. In this edition, we discuss the virtue of Justice and two-character strengths. To learn more about VIA character strengths, please visit the VIA Institute.
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